Rent A Date For Charity

05 January 2008 - A friend in need

Considering I didn’t really have that much to drink last night I woke up feeling awful.  My best mate who has just recently had her first child called me in a bit of a panic.  She recently found out that she was pregnant again and was having a bit of a scare.  I picked her up for her house and we drove to her mums to drop my god daughter off at her parents.

We made our way to Watford general and sat in the waiting room for 5 hours until we were seen.  We spent most of the time talking and catching up on all the gossip I think I probably talked her ears off about Dwight.  For some reason there was some kind of connection between Dwight and I that I can safely say I had never experienced before.

As we sat waiting I could see that Tanya was feeling more and more anxious we made light of the whole situation what with one joke or another.  She was finally seen at 10pm and was almost given the all clear.  She was told to come back on Monday for a scan just to make doubly sure.  It seemed so stupid that the NHS don’t as a rule give scans on a weekend.

I went back to Tanya's house; her partner and her daughter Rose (my god daughter to be) were home.  Rose was sitting on the sofa playing with her toys.  She has become so responsive lately and is always full of smiles.

We ordered a pizza and I made my way home.  Dwight called and came and met me.  We stayed up all night talking and he stayed.

* Some names have been changed for privacy reasons

1 January 2008: Looking Ahead

I woke up with a stinking hangover.  I try not to drink so much usually, as hangovers last for two or three days now. 

Decided on my resolutions for the year ahead:

-          Reach my target of raising £1m for brain tumour charities.

-          Have a boob job.  Yes, I know it sounds frivolous – and odd to want another hospital trip in my life – but I've always wanted a boob job, since long before the tumour.  It would really boost my confidence, and the better I feel about my looks and what is on the outside, the better I feel on the inside.  There are certain things I want to do before I die and this is one of them.  I’ve learned that if I want something enough I have to make it happen sooner rather than later I can’t waist time.

-          Find a partner, settle down and be happy.  It’s hard to find a man.  I always tell them straight away about my tumour.  Some don’t want to even go there, but some get attached too quickly, they feel they have to accelerate things because I don’t know how long I’ve got.  One guy told me he loved me after a week!  I had to walk away.  The hardest thing about the tumour is not having a time frame I could have 10 years left so I have to make plans and look ahead – and that includes finding my soul mate.

31 December 2007: New Year's Eve

I woke up feeling week and disorientated.  It’s my sisters birthday party today – I would usually go, but when I feel like this I hide at home.  I hate people seeing me when I feel ill.  But when I’m absent I always gets loads of emails and texts asking if I’m OK; my mum will sometimes call me 20 times a day.  I know it’s because they care, but I don’t like all the fuss and I crave my own space.

I started to feel better later on and when a friend came over with a bottle of wine, we had an impromptu New Year’s Eve celebration.  A few more friends and my mum joined us, so it turned into a party.  We had the music on full blast and I danced the night away.